banner

She Says She Says

Sadie’s world: Do we need to redefine the word ‘sluttish’?

As multiple dating is becoming more acceptable, Sadie Frost asks whether it’s time for society to redefine what we consider ‘sluttish’
Sadie’s world: Do we need to redefine the word ‘sluttish’?
February 9, 2017   |    Sadie Frost

Finding the key to a healthy and successful relationship is tough enough without the onslaught of women ‘dressed to kill’ on social media vying for attention. But, women can ooze confidence without flashing the flesh. It’s all about feeling empowered. Personally, I like to dress up for me, not for my date. Confidence comes from within.

In this day and age, it seems impossible to meet people or to find a new partner unless you do it through online dating – especially with London being so incestuous with its inner circles and all! How do you meet potential partners when the art of conversation has been replaced by swiping a match on your phone?

DOUBLE STANDARDS

It seems we’re becoming more and more like the US in our dating ways – a society where it’s acceptable to date more than one person at the same time. And when we say date, what does that actually mean? A dinner? A casual kiss? Or going the whole way between the sheets? And if, like some people, you see more than one person at the same time, does that make you a floozie? Or is that the sign of a woman who’s confident, experiencing life and simply in control?

Being a single-mother (even though I’m in a happy relationship), I know there can be certain prejudices on how I operate in the dating arena, but for a man it is completely acceptable to do whatever they like. Having said that, who says it’s acceptable? My kids give me a hard time vetting my dates and convincing me to spend more time on my own! But to be totally honest, I just don’t like it!

FINDING A BALANCE

It’s not about getting hurt. I’ve never wanted to be the victim, so I’ve always been very ballsy. When people behave in certain ways that aren’t honourable or have integrity, I think it’s down to insecurity. And if you’re the one being deceitful, you’ve got to live with that.

There are times I think: ‘why shouldn’t we be allowed to explore?’ and ‘why should women be the ones staying in waiting for guys to call, why should he have all the fun?’ If my friends are suffering, I say to them: why be in a relationship?

The trouble is some people are addicted to pattern. If they’ve always been the ‘good’ one in the relationship, they’re on the receiving end when things go wrong. So it’s about finding a balance – don’t take any crap, but don’t cause it either.

Read more: Sadie Frost on her unconventional family

Do you want more Balance in your life?

Subscribe to our newsletter to get a bi-weekly wellbeing fix, straight to your inbox