Simple ways to reinvigorate your sex life in a long-term relationship
We all know how wild things can be in the bedroom when we first find a new partner, but over time it can be easy to sink into a routine of sticking to your comfort zone when it comes to intimacy.
One sex expert says it’s important to remember sexual intimacy creates trust, deepens your connection and enhances your relationship with your partner.
Sarah Riccio, owner of delicto.com, takes us through her suggestions on how to approach spicing things up in the bedroom when you’re in a long-term relationship.
Sarah says: “Making love in front of a mirror can make any position feel more romantic because couples get to admire themselves mid-play. This can also be a great stepping-stone for folks who aren’t quite ready to try a new position, but still want to explore a sexy, new sensory experience.
“Similarly you can spice up and old favourite. Close up missionary puts a romantic spin on a fan-favourite classic. You start in missionary as you normally would, but the receiver wraps their legs around their lover to pull them in extra close, while the giver cradles their partner’s head and draws it into the erogenous zone between their ear and shoulder. This slight modification allows players to hear and feel each other’s breath and body movements in an incredibly intimate way.
“Lovers who have never tried a “doggy-style” position might want to give it a try to encourage intimacy. There’s no one right way to do it (as long as the giver is behind the receiver) but romantic part about this position is that the giver is able to explore their lover’s body from a new, exciting angle. They can rub their partner’s back while they receive, reach around their body to provide clitoral stimulation, whisper sweet nothings in their ear, kiss the back of their neck — the options are endlessly intimate.”
It’s important to break out of the habit it is easy to fall into and make time for intimacy with your long-term partner. This might mean trying new sex positions, experimenting with toys, or simply starting a conversation about bucket list things to try as a couple.
Sarah concludes: “If you pitch the idea of a new sex position, your lover might feel nervous at the prospect of stepping outside their comfort zone. This doesn’t necessarily mean the answer is no, but it’s important to address feelings of discomfort or performance anxiety before jumping into new territory.
“Take plenty of time to address wants, needs, fears and, if applicable, safe words. If you’re both exploring a new position for the first time, don’t be afraid to tell your partner how you’re feeling, even if it’s not overwhelmingly positive. The more you let yourself be vulnerable with your lover, the greater your shared intimacy will be.”